Saturday, October 16, 2010

It's in the Stars

Do you every use pop-astrology to explain yourself?

When I was young - and traumatized as I always seemed to be back then - I'd consult my runes. One time I went so far as to see a real astrologer / psychic, way out in the country (I had to borrow a car, peeps), and she utterly freaked me out. Among other things, she did advise that when I hit my late-thirties / forties I'd be in touch with numerous people around the world because of my (said with spooky voice) innate communications abilities. As y'all know, in 1988, blogs weren't even on the radar! So I suppose she got something right.

It was then I realized that I don't really want to know what's coming next, or how I'm inclined to handle it. I'd prefer to take it as it comes. With a side of natural-born anxiety.

Having said this, I'm a mega Gemini with Taurus rising. Just about every planet (sun, moon, mercury, venus etc.) is smack in schizo-happy Gemini. And then the stubborn, sensuous, texture-loving, methodical Taurus tones it all down. (Or fights a hideous fight, depending on how your pop-astrological perspective chooses to see it.)

So, while we're popping-it-up, on the plus side, this presumably gives me the dexterity and quickness of mind to take on a technical craft with skill (Gemini) and the methodical, pleasure-seeking, finery-adoring qualities of the Taurus (oooh, pretty!).

Of course, I imagine, if poorly-aspected (as they say), I could end up flighty and distracted to the extent that I never get anything done except eat everything in sight till I weigh a zillion pounds.

You see where I'm going with this, no?

All paths, my friends, lead back to sewing. And these days they lead back to sewing the freakin' Lady Grey coat. I don't think I've ever taken on a personal project that lasted more than a week, much less a month, going on two. As mentioned, my momentum has slurred into inertia, given the numerous life responsibilities I've encountered this month.

The reason I live my life at the pace of a hummingbird (buzzing through the fields with a pounding chest and the intensity of now), is because I know how hard it is to begin.

Doing is easy, by comparison. Working till my fingers are numb and my brain hurts and I'm so confused I don't know what to do is PREFERABLE to the alternative: trying to convince myself to begin the process of becoming numb and tired and embracing confusion like a long lost friend.

In fact, I'm writing this now to avoid the very thing I must do next - the bound button holes that preclude me from going any further in my project.

I'll let you in on a little secret: I'm afraid of the button holes. I'm afraid of the coat, if I stop long enough to think about it. Regrettably, I've stopped long enough to think about it and I'm scared.

I'd rather tear-down the garden for winter (not a job I'm looking forward to) or make some food (always appealing) or write to you (admittedly, a joy).

But I won't. The word stops here. The action commences. I'm going rev myself up and get back in the game. But when you read this, if you could give me a little mental support, I would certainly be grateful.

We Geminis need a lot of encouragement.

6 comments:

  1. I am a Pisces sun with a Gemini rising. I thought it was my Gemini that made me chatty and my Pisces that made me so sensitive. Anywys, I am happy to encourage you. You can master that button hole. You are bigger than it and you can master it. I believe in you.

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  2. I (a Capricorn) feel you on the long-term project ish. I've had some pieces that have taken a year or longer to perfect.

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  3. Your Gemini does make you chatty - and such a great writer. And the Pisces is the mark of a truly sensitive being. Pop-astrology-wise... Thank you for believing in me. I really, really appreciate that.

    Wendy: But you Capricorns are good at putting in the time and effort!

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  4. I'm an Aries. A perfectionist. A Type-A doer. Even now, with a serious disease — and one symptom that is nearly always ongoing for me is exhaustion — I find myself sitting at the computer working on my blog. So, girlfriend, I say: Slow down now! Sit through a commercial. Leave a chapter in your book till tomorrow. Heck — let a project sit for two years. Don't scrub the tub with a toothbrush. Try to relax. RELAX! I know. It's hard. But you don't want life throwing the emergency brake for you. Trust me.

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  5. Blogging TO procrastinate- that's new. Reading Other Blogs, Face/ tweeting and when that fails, doing home improvements are my procrasts of choice, since I'm Supposed to Be Blogging. Well, moving my Grace Blog to Wordpress and teaching myself how to use it (I'm too OLD to learn new stuff) in preparation for my dot com.

    So that's how the brain works.

    I wouldn't go near a clairvoyant. Read Oedipus Rex, shit happens anyway, so don't mess with it.
    xx

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  6. Denise: Yours are words to the wise - thank you for taking the time to share your story! I have to learn to slow down...

    Lisa: Ain't it the truth. I'd rather just go along for the ride!

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