It's in the Stars

Do you every use pop-astrology to explain yourself?

When I was young - and traumatized as I always seemed to be back then - I'd consult my runes. One time I went so far as to see a real astrologer / psychic, way out in the country (I had to borrow a car, peeps), and she utterly freaked me out. Among other things, she did advise that when I hit my late-thirties / forties I'd be in touch with numerous people around the world because of my (said with spooky voice) innate communications abilities. As y'all know, in 1988, blogs weren't even on the radar! So I suppose she got something right.

It was then I realized that I don't really want to know what's coming next, or how I'm inclined to handle it. I'd prefer to take it as it comes. With a side of natural-born anxiety.

Having said this, I'm a mega Gemini with Taurus rising. Just about every planet (sun, moon, mercury, venus etc.) is smack in schizo-happy Gemini. And then the stubborn, sensuous, texture-loving, methodical Taurus tones it all down. (Or fights a hideous fight, depending on how your pop-astrological perspective chooses to see it.)

So, while we're popping-it-up, on the plus side, this presumably gives me the dexterity and quickness of mind to take on a technical craft with skill (Gemini) and the methodical, pleasure-seeking, finery-adoring qualities of the Taurus (oooh, pretty!).

Of course, I imagine, if poorly-aspected (as they say), I could end up flighty and distracted to the extent that I never get anything done except eat everything in sight till I weigh a zillion pounds.

You see where I'm going with this, no?

All paths, my friends, lead back to sewing. And these days they lead back to sewing the freakin' Lady Grey coat. I don't think I've ever taken on a personal project that lasted more than a week, much less a month, going on two. As mentioned, my momentum has slurred into inertia, given the numerous life responsibilities I've encountered this month.

The reason I live my life at the pace of a hummingbird (buzzing through the fields with a pounding chest and the intensity of now), is because I know how hard it is to begin.

Doing is easy, by comparison. Working till my fingers are numb and my brain hurts and I'm so confused I don't know what to do is PREFERABLE to the alternative: trying to convince myself to begin the process of becoming numb and tired and embracing confusion like a long lost friend.

In fact, I'm writing this now to avoid the very thing I must do next - the bound button holes that preclude me from going any further in my project.

I'll let you in on a little secret: I'm afraid of the button holes. I'm afraid of the coat, if I stop long enough to think about it. Regrettably, I've stopped long enough to think about it and I'm scared.

I'd rather tear-down the garden for winter (not a job I'm looking forward to) or make some food (always appealing) or write to you (admittedly, a joy).

But I won't. The word stops here. The action commences. I'm going rev myself up and get back in the game. But when you read this, if you could give me a little mental support, I would certainly be grateful.

We Geminis need a lot of encouragement.