In Which Kristin Examines the Warp and Weft of her Own Creative Impulse...*

You may feel it's been quiet on the crafting front and, to some extent that's true. Since mid summer I've been trying to inject a bit of balance into my creative undertakings. I know, crazy.

I've been largely successful - if successful means unproductive. In short, I spend practically as much energy wondering what it means to be "not crafting enough" as I would have on actual crafting. The difference is that I can do that around my family.

Don't misunderstand. I have made 2 sweaters in the last 6 weeks, and a dress (which is very close to languishing on the lawn unless the advice to simply cut off the facing - which has been under- and top stitched to the dress neck - produces a wearable result. Note: I'm not optimistic and it's too bad cuz my workmanship on that thing kicks ass.) I've learned numerous knitting techniques, started working semi-regularly with a teacher and taken a course on Craftsy, which I intend to put into action soon. I know what projects I next want to undertake: a silk version of the Pendrell blouse, a wool version of my wide-leg pants sloper and another knitted sweater (which I'm in the process of using Ravelry's amazing platform to help me to choose).

And yet I feel like an under-performer.

Why is that? (This is another one of the things I've spent a lot of time considering while not crafting.) At first I blamed it on you. :-) I mean, you have expectations of me. You've come to expect certain things. You're probably sewing up a storm (or doing some other fab, creative activity) occasionally reminded that I really haven't produced much lately.

Then it hit me that I really can be egomanical - as my husband loves to tell me. And projection truly is alive and well.

See, for better or for worse - put this on my pragmatism (which is legendary) or my people-pleasing nature - I am what I do. I'm only as good as that last technique, as that project in which I achieve and exceed expectations. The one in which I learn something I can apply going forward. Throw in a clinical dose of OCD and it's a veritable bomb.

Lord, that's a double-edged sword. On the one hand, I'm always motivated to do more - which inclines one to do more, don't you think? Note: I love finishing garments, and enjoying them (when they work out). It's not like I don't enjoy the crap out of the process or the outcome. On the other, I shouldn't be enslaved to these things (or more importantly, to my impression of what it means to do them in a more measured way).

Sorry to say, there's no point to this diatribe. I suspect I haven't resolved anything by reconsidering the topic or by writing about it. Of course, I love lively debate and commiseration (not that I wish this style on anyone), so we might be able to extract some meaning in that respect. Sometimes you have to put it down on paper to pick it up in real life. Here's hoping...

*Sounds deep, huh?

Updated: Coincidence is Kind

Sweet Custard Tart aka Flan by Michel Roux
Can be found in his (extremely excellent) book Pastry: Savory and Sweet
This book is a must-have for aspiring - and skilled - pastry bakers.

You may recall my rhapsodic description of the flan I ate semi-regularly during my recent trip to Paris. I cannot adequately express the beauty of that pastry. The custard was perfectly formed, neither eggy nor loose. Vanilla bean infused a delicious confluence of cream and yolk. It perched atop a crust that bore no signs of supporting something, frankly, wet (as custard is). That crust was not flaky, but light and dry, very slightly sweet, infused with butter. The tart was so balanced, my ingestion of it was a veritable religious experience.

You probably know how I love food. A perfect meal is amongst my great meaningful life memories (those I'll take with me to my death bed) and - so happily - I had one such meal at Libretto last night. Everyone should eat that pizza (did I mention I don't even like pizza) - just get there by 6 pm or you'll wait in line all night. At any rate, I digress.

Imagine my joy, 5 minutes ago, on discovering (while reviewing the pate brisee recipe, in M. Roux's book, to see if the brisee I have stored in the freezer may still be edible a year later - I'm going to take my chances on a lardons quiche tonight) a photo of my beloved flan in the Enriched Sweet Pastries chapter!

He refers to it as "flan boulanger" (bakery custard), a childhood staple. Trust me, it's one of those tastes that makes the brain ring with association.

I'm away in Mtl. next weekend, or you can bet I'd have this baking on my agenda. It will just have to wait till the weekend after. Alas, if the baking goddess smiles on me, I may be able to recreate my own best memories to share, and to enjoy, with a perfect doppio espresso.

NB Update: Pate brisee will NOT last in the freezer for a year. As it thawed, the dough was a gluten-y mess. So, I got to make some new dough...

Brief Administrative Update

Y'all: I'm slowly working my way back through (much appreciated) comments and replying. So sorry that it's taken me this long. As always, I am thrilled to hear your thoughts so please keep them coming. xoxo

EuroLoot: Coral Cashmere - Paris

Why save the best for last, I say?

This is perhaps the most fantastic cashmere I've ever bought. Three-ply and insanely soft, there was NO. FUCKING. WAY I was leaving Paris boutique, Sandro, without it.

Ever heard of Sandro? It's a Paris-born chain (for want of a better term) that's gone Europe-wide (and will go international soon). The link shows photos of the very place I shopped - and it doesn't do it justice. What a pleasantly adult experience.

I've rarely spent more on a single item of clothing than on this, but on those I have, they were also cashmere - or fur. It's a perfect, vibrant coral - and I don't even like coral!? - that goes so well with my skin tone it floored me. Hell, it floored the sales associate, a friendly though reserved, totally attractive French guy who (frankly) didn't have the acting skills to fake his reaction.

Check out the asymmetric front on this thing, and the side vents. To me, it says: "I have so many other pieces of glorious cashmere, I've decided to go with the most insane cut and colour that a turtle neck has ever seen".

I love the rib and those little holes that sit atop it. They give a luxe texture to the knit.

And here am I, at De Kas (the best restaurant I've been to in a long time), having just finished a glass of Champagne with lemon verbena sprigs, unsure of what would come next - but certain I would not be disappointed:

Not a bad backdrop, huh?

Back to the Future

My child goes away for 6 weeks and comes back looking like:

a) she's 15, and
b) she washed up ashore from 1983.

She shopped for these clothes herself - under the benevolent supervision of my mother, who had no difficulties of any sort (she would like you all to know). The glasses are fake. How on earth anyone of any generation can get away with 80's glasses is beyond me, but I think she manages it. Good thing, since she has 2 pairs - these and a black and white checkerboard version?!

PS: That's the mandated pixie haircut 2 months in. Lord, that haircut caused misery. It was the necessary outcome of a lice incident (the one that broke the camel's back). It didn't help that a little kid in North Carolina mistook her for Justin Bieber and almost started a mob.

PPS: Trying to draw hairstyle comparisons to gorgeous supermodels from the 80s has had relatively little positive effect, what with my kid having absolutely no sense of anything before 1995.

Ms. E's wan grin gives evidence of her prediction that one day children would be unaware of her great influence.

EuroLoot: Motorcycle Jacket in Fleece - Amsterdam

There's a striking difference between French and Dutch fashion, though both cultures are utterly stylish: The French dress to suit their sophisticated whims; the Dutch dress for the weather.

As a Canadian, I completely get that.

The first thing I did, on arriving in Amsterdam on a rainy, 13 degree C-Saturday afternoon, was to buy this jacket:



What with it being July 30, I didn't imagine it would come in that handy - but I wore it every day. Seriously, if I never wear this thing again, I got my money's worth.

Cool feature: It's brandless. There is no label on it anywhere. I think there must have been a name on the tag that came with it (long ago discarded), but now it almost feels handmade.

The workmanship is excellent. It's true to form, but for its fabric. I love the zippers and the length of the sleeves. It's very warm. This seems, to me, extremely Dutch - totally practical, excellently designed, subdued and (more or less) water-impermeable - but with a twist you can't see coming.

Here's a (not so awesome) shot of it in action:

A Tale of Two Cities (Neither of Which is in Europe)

Here's a fantastic clip of Jane Jacobs talking about urban planning and development in Toronto and Montreal in the late 1960s:

Video I found within this post on Spacing Montreal

Ms. Jacobs, as many of you know, was a pre-eminent - though not professionally trained - urban theorist who emigrated from America shortly before the CBC clip (above) was filmed. She's something of a legend in these parts.

It's fascinating to watch her discuss two of the cities I know best in the world, one of which I've lived in for 35 years (since shortly after most of this footage was shot), and to hear her perspective on the grass-roots genius that pervaded Toronto even back when it was very Good. Nonetheless (and just like now!), the city's official stance was to "stamp out fun". Montreal has never had that problem, apparently.

Montreal, according to Ms. Jacobs, managed to preserve while expanding, by allowing the old to coexist with the new, i.e. to avoid slum clearance - which never appears to improve the quality of life for those from whom the slums have been cleared. (The footage cites a number of locations.) Intriguingly, the author of the referential post on Spacing Montreal - Alanah Heffez - does not agree, as she discusses in her piece.

I thrill at recognizing landmarks captured on film before I was born. And I'm hardcore impressed to hear this woman, passionate about what the structure of cities says about how those cities are and how they will be, veritably intuit the outcome of mid-century urban design. She was immersed in the construct of "the city" - and in her own community - and yet she saw it from an elevated vantage point.

She did not shy away from the expression of her many, well-considered opinions at a time when many women were not allowed to have them. She's not shocking, not guarded, not limited by the disinterest of modern media. She addresses a highly political issue - the financial disenfranchisement of the French Canadians in Montreal during the last century - even offering up her own stance on the subject, without throwing herself into the fray.

You should watch this - even if you don't care about cities, urban planning, dead legends or cool b/w footage. I think it will compel you.