Ask The Bra Fitter: Some More Great Answers to Some More Great Questions

Thanks, everyone, for your comments and emails this week. My headache is much better, if lingering, and I think that life may resume with some degree of normalcy by the middle of next week. 

In the meanwhile - and I so appreciate your patience - here are a couple of additional bra-fitter answers. 

Gillian asks:

Yay! I love this series!  I've always worn 36 or 38 bands, but then my sis mentioned she wears a 34 and when I looked up my under-bust measurements, I'm 34 inches too. For years I think I wore 38s because I didn't want a tight band to give me horrible back fat bumps! These days I'm wearing 36s... but should I try a smaller band? How tight is right? And is there any way to avoid the back fat issue? Help! 

Hi Gillian, I'm so pleased you like the series! You want the band of your bra to be snug enough to secure the bra to your body. This gives optimal support, better lift and takes pressure off your shoulders. The back of your bra should sit parallel to the ground, anchored under your shoulder blades. Symptoms of a too lose band include heavy pressure on the shoulders (the band should be taking most of the weight of your bust), the need to constantly re-adjust the bra by pulling the band down, and the scenario in which the band arcs up rather than sitting straight across your back. 

 

There are competing methods of measuring band size. The department store/big brand method is to take your raw under bust measurement and add a whopping 4 to 6 inches. This will likely result in a band that's too big (this measurement system is encouraged as it puts most women within the standard A-DD bra sizes that department stores / Victoria's Secret churn out). The current wave of bra fitters encourage you to add zero inches to your under bust measurement. Personally I vacillate between adding zero and adding about 2 inches. I'd suggest trying on a 34 band (remembering that as you go down in the band you will have to go up in the cup in order to get the same cup volume) to see how it feels. You should be able to breathe comfortably and should not feel any pain, but it should feel snug!

I'm going to interrupt my answer to go on a small rant: Many bra bands are getting stretchier and are being cut looser! I have been fitting for over 10 years (eek!) and I have noticed this change both personally and when fitting clients. When I started bra fitting I wore a 32 band (and was often chided by my co-workers for my love of super snug bands). These days I am 20 lbs heavier and usually need a 30 band to feel secure. In the olden days I would add 2 to 4 inches to a snug under bust measurement to get a starting size for my customer. These days I add 0 to 2. I don't think that this is vanity sizing (see the Linda The Bra Lady snafu) as most women I fit are initially shocked and/or appalled when they hear they fit a 34F instead of a 38C. I would love to find out why bands have changed, as it's "outsizing" many women (i.e. 28 bands now find they need 26) and divorcing many women from their formerly favourite bra styles and companies!

 

Ed. note: I couldn't agree with this more! Bands are going super stretchy - even in the pricey brands...

Bra fitting is not exact, and I believe personal comfort should play a role. I prefer my bands quite snug, while others may want a slightly easier fit. The level of snugness depends on breast size, personal preference/experience and "squishability."  Often a full-busted  woman will want a tight band due to the weight of her breasts, whereas a smaller busted woman may feel better in a slightly easier band. A woman who's just been resized from wearing a 40 band to a 30 band may feel more comfortable compromising with a 32 if she's having trouble adjusting to her new size. Finally, many women with more padding around their ribs can easily wear a very snug band, whereas a woman with a very bony ribcage may feel discomfort in something very tight. 

 

Other ed. note: I LOVE a tighter band, as y'all know.  I think I may have gained my original perspective on this from Veronica, though it's definitely my natural preference. I do think that some people are acclimators and others are (no offense) "fussy". Some peeps grow to love a snug band - esp. when the boobs are large and projectile on a proportionately small frame. Others are just never gonna get with it. Chalk it up to basic sensitivity.

Now for the dreaded "back fat!" First off, this is the least favourite phrase of many a bra-fitter. I don't mean to scold or to go on a hippy-dippy, kumbaya, you-are-beautiful-no-matter-what-they-say trip, but all women indent where there bra wraps around their bodies. Our skin isn't rigid and rock-solid, otherwise we wouldn't be able to move. This means the bra band will press into skin of even the slenderest supermodel. Also, today's fashion is not very forgiving. It's all drapey jersey and tissue thin t shirts. 

 

But... back fat can be mitigated. First off, wearing a too-loose band will actually exacerbate the problem. A too-loose band will ride up to the place where we tend to carry more padding, and as the band creeps up throughout the day, it will push this padding up with it. A snugger band will sit at the place where we have less softness and it will stay there. Next, a broader band - or a band made of stretch lace - will usually cut in less. Finally, in a good bra you'll look so good from the front that no one will pay much attention to the back!

Other, other Ed. note: OMG - I totally agree with that final sentence!!

 

 

Anonymous asks:

I'm intrigued to know a bit more about being a bra-fitter. Did you always want to become one? Are there special perks? (No pun intended!) And since you fit people over multiple occasions, do you find that you see changes in the size and shape of their breasts over various fittings? So many blogs talk about how breast-shape changes over time. I'm curious to know if you observe this in your work?

Ahoy Anon, I'm flattered by your intrigue! I kind of fell into bra fitting. I became enamored of lingerie as soon as I was able to wear bras, however I soon blossomed to a size that was very hard to find and that was usually restricted to boring beige monstrosities.The place I work was actually the first store I shopped in where I could not only find bras in my size, but could find bras that fit me! I applied for a job soon after my first purchase. 

 

While I was excited to work with all the beautiful things I was actually very nervous to work with all the lovely people because I tend to be quite shy. After a little time I became more confident and grew to love the fact that being smushed in a little change room with a stranger could give me the opportunity to help someone (in a small way) and sometimes even have a interesting encounter (bonding over a favourite tv show, ranting about what bras are missing or even discussing personal philosophies). Most of the fitters I know have both a keen sense of aesthetics and a strong desire to help women. Also, many fitters are multi-talented and are working on small businesses, PhDs, bands or books when they are not fitting. 

Like any job, bra fitting is not always hunky dory. Many women carry a lot of self-hate about their bodies, which can make a fitter feel helpless and drained (I understand and sympathize with this self hate, I just wish there was some way to ease this). Some women have unrealistic expectations (i.e. they need a low back, strapless, plunging bra... and they wear a H cup) and some refuse to consider  advice and expertise (a woman with sloping shoulders is going to have trouble keeping the straps up on a demi bra, that's just how it is...). 

 

There are the typical customer service complaints from those who feel they can insult or mistreat service workers. Finally, it's frustrating not being able to control the size ranges and style offerings available. Although fitters and store owners can (and do!) complain to bra manufacturers, those manufacturers don't usually listen!  

 

As to perks, I'm sure they depend on the particular store. Most stores will give fitters some sort of discount. Fitters often get a sneak peek at upcoming styles when sales reps visit. Personally, I have had the chance to travel on buying trips, wear-test bras (so we know whether to bring them in to the store) and have received gift bras from companies hoping to promote their brand. 

I don't feel that breast shape drastically changes over time. Some women will loose a bit of top fullness over time (I've noticed this with age and weight fluctuations), but most changes are in size and firmness. Generally a customer with close-set, full-on-top breasts will retain roughly the same shape. With age her breasts may sit a little lower, and may be a bit softer, but they will generally stay the same. Size and firmness changes through weight loss, weight gain, nursing and menopause. It also can change with hormonal fluctuations (birth control pills), breast tissue migration (pockets of "armpit fat" are often breast tissue that has been rearranged due to ill-fitting wires), and relationship status (this sounds screwy, but many women have noticed their breasts are a bit fuller when they are receiving more amorous attention).

Ask The Bra Fitter: More Questions Answered!

Hey y'all - I've been super busy on all the fronts this week so I haven't had a proper chance to discuss any of the numerous things I find fascinating. (That's code for "write blog posts".) Happily, Veronica is back with another installment of awesome answers to awesome questions. Please let us know if this info is helpful!

 

Kay asks what many of us want to know: 

 

Would Veronica have a recommendation for a non-underwired bra (I don't wear bras with underwire) in a 30 band, having less outer circumference, more depth, less upper bust volume, more lower bust volume, really narrow shoulders... bust cup H-I-J (depending on the day / what I ate the previous week) with plenty of support please? 

 

Hi Kay: Non-underwire bras are really tricky. Unfortunately there is still not a lot of selection, and many styles have a narrow size range. Having said this:

• My favourite is the Freya Dotty softcup. They make a 30H, which is on the smaller end of the size range you wear, but this bra is cut rather big in the cup (and unfortunately a bit big in the back). This bra should work for your shape, and it has great lift, separation and support. 

• My second favourite is the infamous Triumph Doreen. This bra has amazingly firm hold and support and gives great separation. This style starts at a 34 band, but the backs are cut very firm (I wear between a 30 and a 32 band, and the 34 fits well on the second hook). A warning/bonus: the shape is rather 1950s "sweater girl".

• Next up is Aviana's Jacquard softcup. It's very comfortable and gives decent support and will likely suit your shape. They make your cup size, but start at a 32 back, so this bra would require alteration. 

• Finally, Royce specializes in wirefree bras and they make two bras (the Charlotte and the Sadie) in 30H-J. I am vaguely familiar with the Charlotte (I've seen it on maybe 3 women) and not familiar with the Sadie. I find Royce bras are tricky. The straps are often too thin (and can be uncomfortable), they don't give much uplift and tend to give a very separate "east-west" look. But perhaps one of their bras could be made to work.

Ed. note: I've tried the Dotty and the shape is front and centre but it really smushes the boobs together (as bras with no wire all seem to do). The only non-underwired bra I've tried that doesn't smush - at least nowhere to the same extent - is the Triumph Doreen. I can second that I've bought the bra in a 34 and I can wear it on the second hook and I, too, wear a 30 or 32 back. BTW - I LOVE this bra and it's crazy pointy shape. It's truly retro. I mean, seriously, they haven't updated this bra since 1958 and they're proud of it! I also go down a cup size in the Doreen cuz it fits roomily, IMO. I've tried the Royce Charlotte. I never wear it, though I bought it as a lounge bra. It gives a bizarre shape - bad pointy - and it's insanely tight in the back. The straps are strangely positioned to provide maximal hurtiness.

And Anonymous writes:

I have been measured by a pretty reputable store as a 32DD. I have a hard time finding a bra because despite that DD I don't think I'm that prominent. Somewhat of course…DD on a small frame…but to me it seems like my breast shape is more wide than tall if that makes any sense. I can feel breast tissue from my center all the way around to my side and most of the bras dig in on the side and leave a gouge mark by the end of the day. A bigger cup doesn't help because then I don't fill it up.

I've been told the wire shape is called the "smile" and so I feel like I should be hunting for a bra with a wide smile rather than a U shape. So:

1) Is there a brand or certain type of bra style that has a wider smile?
2) How do I get fitters to understand this?

Thanks for introducing me to the term "smile". What a great way to describe an underwire! It sounds like you have shallow breasts with a wide root. I find this shape of bust fits best in a broad demi or a shell-shaped plunge (a shallow plunge with more fullness on the bottom and sides rather than one with lots of depth). 

 

Brands in your size, that tend to have a broad shallow shape, include Marie Jo (the "Tom" is a great shell shape), Prima Donna (many of their lined demis and the "Madison" low full cup) and Curvy Kate's showgirl range. You'll want to avoid Simone Perele and most of Freya. When you are trying on bras, make sure you "swoop and scoop" your breast tissue into the cup to ensure all of the breast tissue is firmly encased in the wire. 

 

Not sure how to help you to get fitters to better understand your needs, as it seems like you have a pretty clear understanding of your body and your challenges with bras! I suggest that you start by clearly stating your situation, and then view the fitting as a way for the fitter to help you (generally women become fitters because they want to help people).  Ask to try some of the styles I've mentioned here and see how it goes.

 

Ed. note: Man, I seem to have a lot to add today! What I'll say is that you know you've found a good fitter when she listens to what you say and encourages you to make bra suggestions to her (or at least is very open to bringing you the brands you'd like to try - even if she senses that they might not end up working on your frame). Bra-fitting is part science and part art. If you and the fitter observe that things are working or not working, you can join forces and move towards the brands, sizes and styles that work best for you. If you don't feel immediate chemistry with your fitter, that's not the death-knell of the experience. We all settle in at a different pace. Remember that fitters see a lot of clients who are really off the mark vis a vis what will actually fit so they sometimes have to develop a "firm" (for want of a better way of saying this) approach to help those women come to terms with new sizing. Some fitters (just people, after all) do this very gracefully and perfectly for the client. Some need a bit of latitude to understand the client better. Mind you, if a fitter is not open to collaborating, I suggest you try on a couple of things and politely move on.

 

Today's questions: Do you wear a non-underwired bra that works for you? Do your breasts have the shallow shape / wide root and, if so, what brands are your faves? My shape is as far from that as could be, so I love learning more about this!

Ask The Bra Fitter: An Intro from Veronica and Some Answers To Questions

Hey Y'all: I'm delighted to share an intro from Veronica, and responses to the first two (of many) bra-related questions posed by readers of this blog:

Veronica's Preamble:

First off, I'd like to say a little about my personal conception of bra-fitting. In my opinion the ideal fitting experience should be educational, collaborative and empowering. A good fitter will explain how a bra should fit and discuss particular features of a client's body shape that may effect her choice of bras. Involving the client in this process encourages education, which speeds along subsequent fittings and gives each woman a guideline for shopping elsewhere (i.e., she'll know if she's being hoodwinked into a bad bra).

Fitting should be collaborative because the right choice of bra is never based entirely on technical fit-points. Aspects such as comfort and aesthetics are rather personal, and a fitter can't provide for them unless she communicates with her client. I've never felt comfortable making decisions for clients, instead I prefer to work with them to find what they need. I can make sure the bra is fitting a client, but I can't tell her how a bra feels on her body, nor can I dictate an ideal shape, style or colour. The most I can do is discuss why she wants a bra to fit a certain way, to ensure that there are no obvious indications of discomfort and to offer my opinion on aesthetics. If a client feels better with a slightly looser band, prefers a round to perky shape, or doesn't want to wear a bra at all, that's her prerogative. 

I'm glad that bra fitting has gained exposure through the media (e.g. Oprah, Double Divas), but I'm always a little annoyed by the fact that these expert fitters often present themselves as infallible and that the women being fit are sometimes characterized as foolish for not wearing the correct size. Most women aren't buying badly fitted bras intentionally, they're buying badly fitted bras because they aren't being offered a full range of sizes and aren't aware that there is a whole other world outside of the conventional "bra matrix" (32-36 A-DD). Bra fitting does require the development of particular skills and knowledge (interpersonal relations, spacial awareness, detail orientation and patience), but the only difference between myself and K-line is my level of experience and product knowledge. (Ed. Note: Way to encourage my fanaticism!) I think fitters will always be necessary as they are able to draw on experience and knowledge which most laypeople don't have. Nonetheless, I believe fit education is key as it empowers women to buy well.

Now onto a couple of questions...

Courtney writes:

Hi!  Thank you so much for doing this feature!  I have a questions that's been plaguing me for years.  Where should my underwire ride?  I realized I was wearing the wrong sized bra when I noticed that my underwire was riding 2 full inches below where my breast tissue stops.  But even now that I've been properly sized and have some great bras that fit my shape well, there are still spots where it seems to be riding low.  Is it a problem with sizing, or my boob shape?  My boobs do seem to have a flat spot on the bottom, towards the middle, and that's where it's the worst :)  If it is my boobs, what do I do about it, or do I even need to do anything?

Hello! Thanks for asking. Ideally the underwires should tuck just under the breasts without any gaps. This placement encourages the maximum amount of lift and support and is usually the most comfortable. Reasons for the wire riding low include:

• a too-loose band (because the bra can't anchor itself to your body, it is able to float around), and

• the wrong wire shape (a narrow wire on a woman with a wider breast shape will pinch at the sides and gap at the bottom, an overly broad wire on a women with narrow breasts will usually gap at the sides). 

If the back of your bra is snug enough it will sit straight across your back and stay in place when you move around. So if the problem is the wires, I'd suggest trying some different brands. I'm not sure of your size range or shape, but for a narrower wire try Simone Perele (smaller bust) or Freya (fuller bust) and for a wider wire try Marie Jo (smaller bust) or Prima Donna (fuller bust). While there are many companies out there that cater to different shapes, there are still many many more shapes of women. So if your bra feels supportive and comfortable but there is still a small gap despite trying new styles, don't worry! In bra fitting we strive for perfection, but like all other areas, perfection is rarely achievable!

(Ed note: This table may be useful as a reference for wire-width.)

Marsha wants to know:

Burning question - why is it impossible for me to find a bra that doesn't eventually slide off my shoulders if I move around and actually perform life actions? I've been told that this happens because my bra band is too loose, but it happens with bras whose bands, if they were any tighter, would prevent me from breathing without effort. (We'll talk about uplift, minimizing, etc., some other time.) P.S. The only bra "expert" I ever knew was the somewhat flaky sister of one of my daughter's friends, who worked at an underwear outlet store and had purportedly been trained, but whose opinion I could never see myself respecting. Is there a degree or certification or something that bra experts can get to vouch for their ability.

Do you have narrow or sloping shoulders? If your bra is snug enough to anchor the bra to your body, the problem may be the bra straps themselves. I'd suggest trying a bra with inset straps. This refers to straps that are positioned more at the center of the cup (like with a full cup and some plunges) rather than off to the sides (like with a demi or a balconette). A wider-set strap on narrower or sloped shoulders will almost always fall off (except those of my beloved Empreinte which angles the straps on its balconettes so that they are more centrally positioned at the back of the bras).

As to bra experts, most bra-fitting courses I've seen are tied to a brand. For example, Eveden (they own Freya, Fantasie, Fauve, Huit, Elomi and Goddess) has a fit school, which I think is pretty well-respected. However, if they only work with their own brands, it's cutting out a range of products that might be better suited to certain women. I'm wary of stores that only carry their name brand (i.e. Change Lingerie or Victoria's Secret) or only carry a very small range of sizes (the usual 32-36 A-DD), because those fitters don't have enough sizes and styles to match to the wide variations in women. When I train fitters the process can take up to 3 months and it involves "bra math" (figuring out sizes, working out conversions), extensive product knowledge, identifying which cuts and brands of bras work best with different body shapes and a lot of practice! So rather than looking for certificates or degrees, I'd be more interested to know how extensive their training is and make sure their store carries a good range of companies and sizes. Finally, there are quite a few fitters who want to fit properly and want to help women, but haven't been provided the training they deserve (shout out to the awesome saleswomen at La Senza who send clients my way rather than misfit them)!

So there you go - first in a series of these posts designed to help you with your burning bra questions. Wait. That came out wrong.

Keep asking and pls. do comment if you've found this useful!

The Bra Adventures: The Ewa Michalak Experience and Some Other Things

Y'all know I read many lingerie blogs and many of those blogs have some fabulous things to say about Ewa Michalak. Certain others of those blogs have less fabulous things to say, specifically about the customer service.

I've discussed the service in a previous post. It wasn't good, but they did pull through when my package was lost in the mail. (Is it wrong of me to suspect that it was never sent in the first place?)

After a month, I received the set shown below:

E Michalak SM Trefl ("Soft Cup")

To clarify, soft cup refers to the fact that the bra cups aren't molded or padded. It does, as you can see, have an under wire.

I was not impressed by this bra in any way.

• The fabric is not particularly supportive. It has a lot of stretch (making it good for a large bust which gravity hasn't touched) which makes the upper cups even more gape-y than they'd otherwise be.

• The wires are fine but they're nothing to write home about, in the support department.

• The band on this bra is quite firm. I wouldn't go down a band size, though many have indicated that bra band and cup sizing is all over the map. A good feature of this brand is that it will custom-make a bra for you in any size. The downside is that every bra seems to be (if one believes the reviews) its own particular size. Some are small in the cups, others large in the band or vice versa. Because customized bras are not returnable, it's a risk.

• This bra wasn't cheap (though not expensive) and I was charged an additional, mystery "Paypal fee" that amounted, if I'm not mistaken, to about 6 per cent of the purchase price. There is no transparency about this fee and it pisses me off.

• It took too long to arrive and the feedback was sporadic. 

• The fabric, while not cheap-looking, has no delicateness. It's just not pretty enough to warrant all of the other hassles. By contrast, I have Empreinte bras that are as delicate-seeming as tissue, and they're far more supportive.

To put this into perspective, I paid about the same amount for the Cleo Melissa and it fits like a dream. It's utterly supportive. The band doesn't budge. It's gorgeous and unique. The cup is deeper than the one on the Trefl, but still open enough to accomodate a full-on-top breast.

Look, if you have very full-on-top, difficult-to-size breasts, perhaps this is a good option for you. I've only tried one style, and I do think the support is underwhelming, but I'm no expert on the brand. What I can say is that it's gonna be a long time before I bother with this again so I'm grateful to have other alternatives.

No, I'm not going to return this set. That would be far more trouble than it's worth. It's sitting in my adoption drawer, tags and everything. I'll aim to sell to recoup the money I spent on it, at some point.

But moving on...

An Update about "Ask The Bra Fitter": I want to let you know that Veronica is reviewing your questions and she'll answer a couple at a time. I hope to be able to address the first batch of your fantastic queries early next week, so please stay tuned.

And finally, once again today, I was approached by some lovely women who are requesting my bra-assistance via local shopping excursion. It's amazing to me that people - those who don't even know me as "the crazy lady who has a blog wherein she talks obsessively about bra fit" - have begun to ask me for this sort of help on a regular basis. Scott has a theory that I should put up a page about my bra-fitting services and turn it into a side-line business. (He also has a theory I should charge $1000 a day and become bra-fitter to the stars, so I think you need to take his ideas with a grain of salt.) A while ago, I decided to lengthen my May long-weekend by adding on an extra day. Now, it seems, I'll be spending it with the savvy women who own and run the hair salon I frequent.

On this topic: Every bra-fitter has a bias. Some go in for the tight bands (I get this, on a personal-choice level.) Some use measuring tapes. Others take pride in their ability to suss it out through experience and intuition.

There are suspect systems out there. (You no doubt read about these all the time.) After all, a ridiculously high percentage (TBD) of women are wearing the wrong size bra at any given moment. There are also some very good methodologies. Veronica was taught one of those - and she has a great eye.

I myself, have never been formally trained how to fit a bra (not that there's a degree to be had), but I've learned in many different ways:

• My own breast shape and size is challenging to fit. I've spent hundreds of hours and tried on hundreds of bras in an effort to understand fit - as it pertains to me.

• I've read zillions of blog posts written by women of all shapes and sizes to learn more about what works and doesn't work for them.

• For years, I've been helper-shopper, searching out bras for family and friends.

• I've always had a strange and reliable ability to determine what will fit whom. I frequently buy clothing of all sorts for and with friends and family and, while I'm not 100% successful, my odds are pretty good. 

• I take fit fucking seriously. I'm the woman who spends 30 hours working out the math to fit a sweater - aka the addition of volume. I sew, wherein I have to consider carefully, how to strategically remove volume. I think it's fair to say, since I dream about it at night and mull it over every spare minute of the day, that this is an area wherein I am adequately - and ongoingly - self-taught.

So let me share my bias.

I don't care what bra-size you end up wearing. I just want you to find a bra that fits terrifically and makes you look great. Your boobs will be the same size whether that happens in a 32C or a 38H. Your size is meaningless as far as I'm concerned. Your shape is everything.

Secretly, I do love to speculate about the size my "fit subjects" will wear. It's a fun party trick. When I'm right, it's a kick. When I get it wrong (and there are so many variables contributing to this), who cares? We go up or down a cup size / band size - and try a variety of styles - till we find what works.

Every woman knows when she finds the bra for her. She loves the look and the fit. Women are the best arbiters, once they've been given the tools, to choose the right bras for themselves. When the gore tacks at the breastbone and the cups drape over the breasts and lift/support without being too small (pillowing) or too large (gaping), when the band is firm and doesn't budge - but also doesn't hurt, when the wires are high and supportive, but don't dig in - these are the signs of good fit and happy breasts - and a sexy look.

If you're reading this and you've not yet found a bra of this description, do not despair. It's out there. Just keep reading and trying and looking. If there's a good boutique in your area, visit it. Even if the fitters don't work for you, the stock is there. Try that stock from the vantage point of reading you've done. Order online. Get comfortable with returns.

And, of course, avail yourself of Ask the Bra-Fitter! Veronica is ready to answer your questions. And let me assure you, she knows her stuff.

Bra Adventures: Kismet and Other Stories

My friends, there is so much excitement around here lately... There's the window washing (since the reno, we have a zillion more windows) and the gardening and the fabric shopping and pattern choosing and the knitting-fitting math and the spring cleaning - but (as I pause to take a breath) let's leave that for the moment.

Let's talk about some developments in the Bra Adventures department:

For starters, after a mere 6 weeks, my Ewa Michalak order arrived. I haven't yet had time to try it on, but I will very soon. And then, natch, you'll hear all about the fit and all of my many feelings. I just tried it on and, of course, it doesn't fit. I don't know what degree of proportional upper cup fullness one would require to get this bra to actually fit but, let's just say, it's far more than mine (and I'm not a slouch in that department). I'm going to review the bra in detail shortly. But briefly: Boobs on a plate, my ass.

However, much more exciting, here's a little story for you:

Many years ago, I was fitted at a TO bra boutique by a delightful and extremely talented young woman. To preserve her privacy, let's call her Veronica. (I think that name sounds rather "sassy bra fitter", don't you agree?) Time elapsed, she moved on to other venues (as did I), and we lost touch with one another.

At any rate, a few weeks ago, Veronica contacted me by email to advise me that she'd found my blog, was enjoying my bra-related posts and, perchance, did I remember her? Um, did I ever! I've thought of her often over the years as a) she is the best bra-fitter I've come across (and I've known many good bra-fitters) and b) long before the term was coined, she and I were "boob twins". In case you're unfamiliar with the term, a boob twin is someone who shares your size and shape of breasts and can wear - and look equally fab - in most of the same bras, in the same size as you.

Back then, boob twins were like unicorns (especially with our boobs!).

Veronica would let me know when new styles arrived - those that were destined to work on me because they worked on her - and we had the same quirky taste in patterns. This was in the era of quality Freya (vs. the "fits young boobs at the young boob price point" thing they've got going on now. Oh Freya, how you have forsaken your original market. I hope it doesn't come back to bit you in the derriere.) 

Intriguingly, we two are not similar in size and shape in any other way. She is tall. She has a broad frame. (She also has the loveliest hair!) The point is, you don't have to have the same proportions as your boob twin. And, as ephemeral as is everything else in the world, so is boob twinness.  Having met recently on a couple of occasions (oh, read on!), we are no longer boob twins (in size, anyway). She's still much younger than me - and her bust has expanded slightly, while mine is in a different sort of flux.

As I recently bought some bras that are too large for me, and she has some that are too small for her, we decided to do a swap! More on this later, but I want to tell you that I walked away with two great bras and (amazingly, given that my swap collection was far less substantial than hers) EVERYTHING that I had worked for her. It was like bra Christmas in May!

Anyway, I could go on forever about the truly illuminating bra-talk we've been having. I sense it is possible (though I loathe this terminology) that I am a bra "geek". How can 3 hours go by, as if in the blink of an eye, discussing the relative cup depth and wire widths of independent brands?? 

And better still, having asked a zillion questions of Veronica, and having been fascinated by all the answers, I requested that she might assist us here in a little exercise called "Ask the Bra-Fitter".  

How do I Ask The Bra-Fitter? 

So here's what I suggest. If you'd like to ask a question - about anything bra-related (from the structure and technology of bras to the politics of bra-fitting), please email me. It would be helpful if the subject heading alludes to the Ask the Bra Fitter series. It's no problem if you'd like to remain anonymous for the purposes of these questions. Just let me know in the email that this is your preference. 

When I receive your questions, I will forward them to Veronica (without names or distinguishing detail, as requested) and ask her to provide a response. Then, I'll post the question and the response on my blog (administrative process, tbd).

Please do avail yourself of this awesome resource. I have learned so many things from Veronica and I'd love to expand the dialogue to include you! 

Today's questions: What do you think of this concept? Are there any burning questions you've just never had the chance to ask? Have you ever befriended an "expert"? Let's talk!