Saturday, March 14, 2015

Scattered and Focused

Ahoy hoy lovelies. Got a lot of stuff on the go this weekend - including de-lining a pair of RTW pants (the seamstress wanted 35 bucks?!), making a new McCall's 6844 (to suit my latest alterations) and organizing the bras I've either never worn (or rarely wore) for another little bra sale.

More on bras to come but I do want to say that I'm not selling for profit. This is about making sure that great bras - which don't suit me - find wonderful new homes in which to thrive. I'll charge 5-10 bucks per bra, depending on wear and pedigree, (which is simply to make it worth my effort to get my ass to the post office) and the actual cost of packaging/shipping (which will not marked up). You should know, however, that depending on where you are, that shipping could easily run 15 bucks because I live in a country with a stupid postal service that obviously doesn't care about survival.

A propos of this, I'm on a mission (and it's not pretty) to divest myself of any lingerie that no longer works either because of size (I've decided to buy 34 bands for the foreseeable future because my body just can't manage a snug band at this point, without triggering pain. I have many 32 bras that still work with extenders (or because the bands were never snug 32s), but the tight ones are on the chopping block.) I've also thrown out every pair of undies that doesn't fit perfectly. And that's more than I'd like to admit. No question, my body is different now than it was 2 years ago. It's not fatter, per se, but it's not as small. My midsection has expanded, despite careful eating and exercise. And I'm not going to shove myself into things that don't fit perfectly - especially underwear! These days, it's impossible not to dwell on body image, vis a vis mid to late-stage perimenopause, and I'm sure there's a post in it - if not 5. Truth is, I'm so confused by it (in some ways), that I'd prefer not to entertain the subject.

Not to mention that one does begin to adjust to the new landscape. You cannot remember who you were at 22 (even if you think you do). You don't remember every supple curve, skin tension, clarity, bounce and fullness. Sure, I know that I'm not as I was (or as I might be if my livelihood depended on being stridently slim). I mean, I changed substantively at 30, for having had a baby - never to return to my pre-maternal shape - but I regained equilibrium and, in some ways, became more physically attractive than I had been before. I just wonder how this will all reflect itself in my latest meaningful female life transition.

Anyhow, that's what's on my agenda, given gloomy weather which is - to its credit - super warm (8C). Stay tuned for more.

Today's questions: When's the last time you went through your bra and undies stash to determine what simply isn't going to work anymore? How often do you do this and under what circumstances. I do it at least once a year - though I have to say, I don't usually cull as much as I've done this go round. How do feel if you discover that your body has changed and your lingerie wardrobe isn't working? Gotta admit, there's a part of me that's sad (because I've loved my bras or because I don't like the direction of change) and another part that says - bring it on, more bras to replace the old ones!, more chances to see myself anew. At any rate, let's talk!

10 comments:

  1. My body changed a long time ago, when I had my first biological child at 42. But I have recently made some changes to bras and underwear (mine are more utilitarian than yours so less interesting). I decided to stop buying plain white cotton briefs and I started buying Wacoal cotton briefs. They're smaller than regular briefs, don't come up as high on the waist, and they have a lovely wide lace band at the top - very comfortable. Just as comfortable as the briefs. And just a couple of weeks ago I decided to stop wearing underwire bras. I'm going for comfort. I ordered 7 bras from Kohl's, liked 2, will return 5 and order multiples of those 2. My approach to bra-buying is not like yours! I just look for comfortable bras that sort of fit and give some support. I'm exercising more and comfort is important.

    I haven't given away my underwire bras yet, but they are destined for the charity drop box.

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    1. Hey - we all have our preferred styles and systems. I say, as long as it fits and you feel good in it, that's perfect underwear!

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  2. I'm doing this now for much the same reasons as you. Snug bras are painful to wear so I'm making some soft bralettes that fit and are comfortable. Ditto the underwear.

    My body changed a lot after becoming a mother but it has changed the most since entering my 40s and being diagnosed with psoriatic arthritis. Swelling and weight gain have changed my shape even though my measurements from a sewing perspective have not. These days, style is a lot about what doesn't hurt to wear!

    I have to give you a big high 5 for accepting your new body and new 'normal.'. It isn't easy by any stretch. I applaud your strength and positive outlook, as well. As someone who is in a similar situation, your writings have definitely boosted my mood and confidenc . Thank you.

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    1. Oh, the forties. Such transition... I know what you mean about measurements remaining the same though something very fundamental has shifted. Thanks to you Sarah. It's great to know that my words about pain aren't getting lost in the vortex. You know how isolating pain can be! And, what I have figured out over the last year (and it has been tricky in some ways) is that there are bras that can be comfortable and beautiful. So just keep trying things (and making them).

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  3. Change is not always good but shipping may be less of a hassle now. You can prepare your parcel at home https://www.canadapost.ca/personal/tools/cst/intro-e.asp So, providing you have a small scale, all you would have to do is drop the parcel in a mailbox on your way to work.


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    1. Thanks Sox. I'm just not quite ready for this system - I need to buy the mailers and I feel the need to hand the parcel to the post office worker. I'm weird that way. But this is super info - I'm working up to it!

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  4. I've been refusing to get rid of any of my bras - after all, they might fit again, right? But I've put them into storage instead of leaving them all in the drawer - that's as far as I can go now.

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    1. Ha! Look, I'm all for that philosophy, but sometimes the writing's on the wall. I'd prefer to buy new when my size shifts because my shape might not be the same. And it's not fun to think about all the pretty things one doesn't fit into perfectly, taking up valuable lingerie space.

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  5. I just sorted through my bras and set aside at least half of them to donate. About half of my underwear as well.

    My body started changing when I hit my 50s and I'm finally at the point of accepting that it isn't going to spring back into its former svelte shape.

    The biggest motivator however, was the pain.With other health issues to deal with I don't need bras that hurt. I'm sewing new underwear and working on tweaking a bra pattern to be comfortable all day.

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    1. So - you got to your 50s before body change occurred. Fascinating. Hey, if it's going to happen, it's going to happen. But I say delay is good! :-)

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