To a "T"

I realize it seems I’m always coming back to my big boobs and short waist but I think, given the context of this blog, they are relevant facts. Now, neither in its own right is a particular misery. (I know many of you would suggest that big boobs are never a misery and I’m sure the majority of men would agree…) A short-ish waist is not a problem on a toothpick. Large breasts have their plus points – and are quite delightful on a number of frames. Put them together on a small, curvy girl and you’ve got some shopping challenges. Not that I’m the kind of girl who shies away from challenge. Hell, I court challenge. Challenge and I have a thing going.

Yesterday I promised I would write (a la technical stylist with a show on Bravo) about the way to wear a most classic piece: the white T. If you are really tall, medium-boned with an athletic frame, smallish breasts and a flat stomach, chances are I’m not talking to you. Having said that, I invite women of this description (all 6 of you) to write in and tell me how it’s hard for you too :-) However, let’s say you are not so tall, not so flat, not so medium. Them lumps and bumps just seem to glow when dressed in white, non? Then add pallor to the mix and it's a party...

I am of the belief, as I’ve mentioned many times – and have photographically sampled styles outside the “safe” zone for my shape – that everyone can work every trend (some better than others natch) to some degree. You wanna wear the high waist, there’s a pair of pants that will enable this. Strappy ankle straps on thick legs, there’s a trick. However, for my money, the white T has always presented with issues:

• Thin fabric = TMI
• Short style = waist lumps (even on a slim waist)
• Seriously lowcut = pornographic
• Too tight = sausage casing effect
• Too loose = boxy and chubbifying
• Stiff fabric = too loose in the waist and shoulders / too tight in the chest

You can see how so many of us have our work cut out. Alas, the T is NEVER one size fits all, so even as I make suggestions you will have to take them with a grain of salt and use this post simply as a guideline, as an opportunity to think about your own shape that much more mathematically (not that you gorgeous readers aren’t perfect as you are).

The most universally flattering cut, IMO, is:

• A thin (but not see-through) cotton with a tiny bit of lycra (or very good denier)
• A scoop neck – for some that scoop will be more on the crew side of the equation, for those with awesome decollete (that isn’t tres voluptuous) go scoopier
• A cap-sleeve that isn’t too short – idea is to bring the sleeve to the slimmest part of your arm (The sleeve must not be too tight but, lord, don’t let it be loose a la 1978…)
• Waist skimming – almost too tight but not
• Hemmed at the hipbone

Now this is one variation on a piece of infinite varieties. (I hate it when, having blathered on ad nauseum, I can’t even scratch the surface!)

So let me leave you with this: Regardless of your shape, the white T is a classic, sexy garment – not an afterthought. The eye is drawn first to the tits, then to the shoulders. It’s got to fit in both of these places (depending on your shape and comfort zone, you can work this loose-ish or tight-ish but the proportion has to work on your frame). Moreover, the proportional relationship between these body parts must be balanced by the cut of the T.

Work this and you will be unstoppable. Trust me.