Legal Alien

I've just returned from my long weekend getaway to see family in Charlotte and, let me say, it almost restored my religion. It appears that the local 1:4 church to people ratio has convinced God to bestow there some excellent weather. Not excellent, really, more like perfect. In truth, to date, every time I go to NC the sun shines. Moreover, apparently - in some sort of artistic joke - God also decided to put all the tasteful and houseproud people with an fantastic sense of architectural proportion in the same geographic area. I mean, there were cherry blossoms, in bloom, lining every freakin' street?!

I'm sorry if you live anywhere else and you missed this...

The trip had other high points: Visiting with family is always a good fortune. My daughter had a joyful, familial time with her cousins (an opportunity she is, sadly, rarely afforded). In honour of her soon-to-be 11th birthday, my mother and I made a cake and we all surprised her with it.

I suppose it would be cinematic if I could visually represent the sound of brain shock which, no doubt, those of you who know my mother - or any of my posts about her utter disinterest in baking - are likely experiencing, having read that last sentence.

Alas, she was out of box mix (!?) so we had to improvise. For those of you intimidated by whipping up a birthday cake in 2 hours, let me assure you it is entirely achievable. Just keep your cool. I altered the recipe - no egg whites cuz I don't like fluffy cake (more yolks instead) and greek yogurt mixed with 2% instead of buttermilk (which we didn't have on hand). I even had my first chance to bake in a gas oven, generally not recommended. Happily, my mother's oven is very high-end. Plus, it had a convection switch and I watched it like a hawk. In case you're curious, I lowered the temp by 15 degrees and it took 33 minutes (instead of 50-60 min.) I can see how you'd totally wreck a cake if you didn't know that gas ovens work differently than electric ones (which tend to bake more evenly). This cake was maybe the moistest I've ever participated in making, so there goes that prejudice.

The icing was cream cheese, butter, confectioner's sugar, vanilla and a bit of red food colouring for maximum pink. We decorated with raspberries, blackberries and strawberries. How tweenie-girl cute is that?*

However, it was not all fun and games as evidenced by this little anecdote: I see approximately one movie a year, generally with Scott, often while visiting my family. This year the choices were The King's Speech and Battle LA. Yes, you did read that correctly. Guess which one I saw?

I don't know how I'll ever get the immortal phrase, "Let's show those alien fuckers how it's done", out of my mind. It's amazing how many things require 200 rounds of ammo before they'll die. I suppose, from that perspective, it was educational.

*I didn't take photos but others did. I will post a shot as soon as I receive them...

I Heart NY

I don't even know where to start. What an awesome weekend full of adventures large and small - many of which can only be described (11 year-old-style) as random.

Having walked and - literally - talked for 14 hours straight for three days, my brain is mush - I appear to be coming down with a cold that I'm still fighting it with all my might, though at this point it's pretty far gone. I can only hope my Emergen-C mainline will keep it it lite, as it were.

Who cares though? It goes without saying that New York is amongst the most phenomenal cities in the world. Add some mid-spring weather and amazing friends to the equation and it was otherworldly.

Let me leave you with a few spontaneous NYC travel snippets (to be explored in more detail soon):

• No joke, all NY bloggers - and those who convened in the city from elsewhere with whom I met - are freakin' gorgeous. I don't mean to be shallow, but they're really fun to look at.
• They also happen to be, in general, taller than you think they will be.
  
• I met the venerable Kenneth King at the Chelsea Flea Market and was nervy enough to quote him back to himself (Paraphrase: "If you're not wrecking 10,000 yards of fabric, you're not learning how to sew.") Somehow Peter got me to undo my just-bought cape (Barney's) to show Kenneth my new handmade dress, heretofore known as the Chelsea dress, which I was wearing while shopping. You can only imagine my horror. But of course I complied. :-)
• I found a ring I estimate to be worth in the thousands of dollars, that a woman accidentally left by the side of the bathroom sink, at Maialino. Needless to say I turned it in. Then, the next day, I stupidly forgot an amazing package of 55-dollar finds from the flea market on a table at Craft Bar and the server threw it out. Remarkably, I was able to retrieve a vintage Jean Desses scarf - which I'd just scored for 5 bucks!!!!? - and 2 pieces of beautiful, mod, 60s bakelite jewelry along with scraps of toast. And miraculously the scarf was unharmed. I like to think of it as the (stressful, urban) circle of karma.
• The Gramercy Park Hotel is the sexiest spot in NYC. Seriously, I saw attractive people having sex in the lobby. Discreetly. But no so discreetly I didn't notice and observe, arguably for too long, in some gritty NY voyeur experience. I felt Lou Reed should have been sitting in the Jade Bar, waiting to regale me with stories of the Lower East Side proto-punk movement.
  
• The Pod Hotel is not sexy. It's more cheap and cheerful - though sadly fails on both of those accounts. Avoid it.