Worth Its Weight / Wait

Remember the recalibration? It's been a while since I've spoken about it but I did some recon this morning and things are ticking along.

It so happens that my preferred method of assessment is the measuring tape. Let's extol its virtues for a moment, yes? It can fit in the smallest of purses (not that you're carrying it around, necessarily, but you can't say the same of a scale). It costs a dollar - so why not own 10? It comes with two systems of measurement - you can feel free to be metric or whatever the non-metric system is called. But best of all, it actually gives you the information you require to determine why your wardrobe is now fitting or not fitting and/or what size of clothing you should be looking at next time you make or buy something. The scale ain't gonna do that.

I heartily recommend that everyone check her measurements prior to a shopping spree - just to get a sense about whether she's going to be looking at one general size range or another. Even though RTW sizing is all over the map, the tape tells you about you - relative to the last time you checked. That's useful. Having said that, I'm the woman who customizes her dress forms to her own personal measurements. Perhaps mine isn't the median perspective.

When your body changes shape, for the myriad reasons and in the myriad ways in which it does, the transition does not always occur where you imagine it will (or should). Just ask those who lose a lot of weight while still it clings to one long-standing spot. Or the women in perimenopause who gain mass in the midsection- even if that has never been the tendency. It's useless to know, for example, that your weight hasn't changed in 10 years, if every time you go to put on a certain garment, it won't close. Measuring tapes can give you more information than a scale ever will.

Which brings me to my point: The measuring tape only cares to tell you about how things will fit. It's not prejudicial. It doesn't fuck with your mind by going up and down and sideways 5 lbs on a whim. To what, exactly, does your weight correlate? (Let's not veer into discussion about diabetes or heart disease - this isn't a post about physical health.)

Intriguingly, though, even when one uses a measuring tape to advise about the specifics of body proportions, it doesn't necessarily tell the full tale. My 5-second, angst-free measuring tape moment this morning told me that my bust, waist and hip measurements have each decreased by 1 inch since the beginning of September.* (BTW - I had a similarly unemotional moment 2 months ago when I learned my measurements had increased over the summer. It's not like my clothes and photos didn't tell me the same thing...) But let's consider this for a moment.

I can tell you that my bras are fitting differently. As you may know, I have a selection of bras in slightly different back and cup sizes to address previous fluctuations. The ones with the smallest back measurements were off limits for a while, until recently. Happily, I have equally nice lingerie in the next back size up. (Why should I be punished for my body's propensity to fluctuate??) The fact is, my bust measurement has changed largely because my back has lost fat. It hasn't toned (I don't see how it could have - unless knitting counts as conditioning!). My breasts have not shrunk. They are a smidge smaller in the upper cup perhaps, but not notably.

Turning attention to my hip measurement: At least to date, my body doesn't store fat at the high or low hip. How can I have lost mass here?? Simple: I've lost it in the (captured by the equation) derriere.

The one measurement I take at face value is waist circumference. As a person of Italian and Hispanic heritage who tends to gain in the midsection, when I lose mass here, it means I've lost weight. But never mind that - what it really means is I can fit into more clothing I already own.

The point is that my recalibration exercise has yielded the desired result. I wonder if, in another 2 months, I might be down another inch in each of these spots - cuz then I'll be back into the full range of smaller garments in my closet.

You'll note this transition has not been quick but it has been steady. It has not shocked my body. It has not forced me into the domain of extremism. Were I to guess, I'd say I've lost 6 lbs but, seriously, what do I know? I haven't stepped on a scale in a year. Point is, 6 lbs would signify a loss of only slightly more than half a pound a week - well below the 1.5 - 2 lbs "they" say is healthfully feasible and optimal. And still, it works for me because a) I feel better b) I look better in clothing IMO and c) my aim was to lose inches, not weight.

Some of you mentioned you might do a version of recalibration when last we discussed this. Has that occurred? If yes, how's it going for you?

*I should also add, I could easily record many additional measurements, were I so inclined. Upper leg comes to mind, since it's such a challenging spot for many re: fitting. Upper arm and ribcage measurements are very useful for those who are about to embark on a formal-wear adventure.

Recalibrating the Recalibration

So, let me get this started by advising that - while technically I'm almost a week into Phase 2 of the recalibration - I am not following the "half a unit of alcohol daily with bubbly water" thing. I really tried, if you count thinking about it excessively as trying, but I just couldn't get past the engrained perspective that a spritzer isn't worthy of my personality. How then, you might be wondering, is Phase 2 different from Phase 3? Well, more or less, simply inasmuch as phase 3 includes swapping up "good carbs" on occasion for "yummy carbs" i.e. couscous for cake. That latitude is not built into Phase 2.

Furthermore, as I did my "trying", I was increasingly able to clearly articulate what not drinking did not do for me. (Only in my mind, obvs, cuz this sentence is an inarticulate disaster.)

Not drinking alcohol for the better part of 2 weeks did NOT:

• Improve my skin
• Improve my mood
• Improve my experience of food - or anything else, for that matter
• Melt pounds of fat from my midsection (or even half-pounds)

It did however:

• Give me a good opportunity to consider the nature of deprivation - something I generally avoid at all costs, though there are lessons to learn along that path; and
• Facilitate an experiment I've never before tried, designed to a) determine how I'd feel without alcohol for a (semi) extended period which isn't pregnancy - BTW, that's a torturous time to have to give up booze... and b) determine whether de-puffing and/or fat loss, in my body, would be motivated by a lack of alcohol (remember that's my mother's theory).

If nothing else, the reduction of hard-to-metabolize, non-nutritious carb calories has arguably led to the beginnings of my return to desired proportions. But, frankly, I was surprised it didn't have more of a notable physical affect. Apparently, 2 - 3 glasses of wine, for an extended period, is likely no more responsible for my de-toning (at least at this age and stage) than all the pastry I combined with it.

For me, the choice is to continue to abstain - which is the psychic equivalent, to me, of living with food allergies. If you know me well / my relationship to this topic, you will know that I am regrettably intolerant of food intolerance (and by this I mean no offense to the people who struggle with it legitimately) - or to drink real glasses of wine (and by that I mean ones not watered down by Perrier - a soft beverage I do respect in its unadulterated form).

Since my return to Boozlandia, I have had 1 drink a day (5 oz, clearly measured) of red wine. What does it do for me? It complements my food, which I choose so carefully for its correlative and aesthetic qualities. (I am a staunch LOVER of food, peeps.) It makes me feel like I'm a "regular person" not a "dieter". It tastes good. It relaxes me after a long day at work. It's something I associate with friendship and good conversation and travel and freedom from daily responsibility. Does it actually produce those things? Of course not. It's a freakin' glass of wine, not a framework the likes of which I've worked my entire adult life to create.

Nonetheless, that's where I'm at. Apparently, the second edition of my best-selling lifestyle recalibration will have an option in Phase 2.

For what it's worth, I spend very little time thinking about exciting food I'm not eating. I ingest excellent, protein rich things, don't snack, and eschew all sugar but from occasional fruit and a small dose of chocolate. (I'm pretending I'm Jennifer Aniston.) And I do feel it's having an effect.

What about you? What does alcohol mean to you? Or "dieting"? How do you relate to perceived deprivation? What foods / drink can you give up reasonably easily? Which ones leave you fixated on lack?