Finally, A Tag I'm Responding To...

Of course, it's the last one in (but it's easy), which is why it's getting the fast attention.

I should mention, at this point, that I LOVE being tagged and I appreciate it tremendously and I am hideously remiss in not responding to the many I've received over the last couple of months. It is not because I don't value the concept or the gesture. It's because, right now, I seem to suck at responsiveness. Please bear with me...

So, Sal gifted me with the fascinating "Show me your Blogspot" tag:

The rules:
1. Once you are tagged, post a picture of where you blog.
2. Feel free to tell us a little about your space, or explain certain items in more detail. Or not.
3. Link back Daddy Likey's original post.
4. Tag five other bloggers to show their blog spots.
5. If you are tagged and do not participate, you will become allergic to cabbage.

Honestly, I'm already allergic to cabbage - at least in as much as I won't touch the stuff. But I am nonetheless compelled to present you with the (rather unassuming) blog space:


Yes, that is an Ikea chair. But the table is handmade, awesome story, and I bought it at the Trinity Bellwoods art sale a few summers ago (bargaining the price down to $500.00 including delivery). When the delivery guys - also the creators of this beautiful design - put it in the living room, everybody sighed audibly with delight. It was the perfect table in the perfect spot. What I particularly love about it is the warm and cold juxtaposition. The recovered pine rectangles are 6 inches thick and affixed to a modern, steel frame. It matches everything and nothing at the same time. And my legs sit on it at just the right height.

So, I not-so-secretly wanna see the blog spots of:

Tanya Espanya
Monkey
Songy
Bel - I don't think you've done it, have you??
Girl Japan

They Call Them Superfine for a Reason

You know how I've been feeling like shit. And, gotta say, I haven't been looking my red letter best. Well I dropped out of Friday night dinner with S&N - a meal I enjoy tremendously - because, with lingering sore throat and cluster cankers all over my mouth and menstrual misery etc., well, I just needed to lie on the couch and eat macaroni and cheese.

I also needed to have my glasses adjusted in rather a dire way. So I detoured into Spectacle on my walk home. (Yes, I still walk hours a day in freezing cold, despite feeling wretched. Why, I'm starting to wonder.) And what ensued - so strangely, given how I feel - is one of those shopping kismet experiences one really cannot predict. I mean, it was one of those experiences which results in the credit card company rep asking to speak to you, after keeping you on frickin' hold for 10 minutes, because she suspects fraud. And it surprises me because I needed precisely one thing (though, as always I've had a few things penciled on the mental list) and, till today, I hadn't spent a dime except on toothpaste and vitamins in more than a month.

I'm not going to detail all the items here and now. Where would be the element of surprise in that??

I will say, however, that I made use of Stylefind's great sale alert, and hit Jonathan & Olivia, a chichi boutique I've written about in some detail before. It was having a truly amazing sale and I still managed to buy the one item at full price.

And something on sale too.

Let me just say I've become one of those idiots who spends $220.00 on jeans. And another $125.00 on jeans on sale. Both pairs - the first aptly named "Superfine" to describe the sight of my trumped up ass in them, and the second, a pair of indigo, skinny Earnest Sewn's - are truly the MILFiest things I've ever owned. What do you mean, Kristin, you may ask. What makes them scream "fuckable mom"?

Well, having had 10 minutes (while waiting on hold with the credit card company) to consider this pertinent question, I can answer it with confidence. MILF jeans are not defined by their cut or the denim, the colour or even the stitching. No, MILF jeans are defined by the height of the rise.

Cuz let's face it, no self-respecting regular woman who has lived through the alien distention of her abdomen to hatch a human being, is going to be caught dead (much less sexy) wearing jeans that button at the pubic bone.

I am happy to tell you that the makers of Superfine and Earnest Sewn are in touch with this reality. And that's how they get away with charging you the price of a cheap ticket to Boston on a pair of pants that aren't even lined.

Photos and other tales to follow. Promise. But I'm curious to know who else (mother or no) has owned either of these brands. Please share your tales.

You Want Somma This?

My friend Sandra, who's had a number of mentions lately in this forum, recently bought an insanely expensive - marked down by a zillion dollars, and still expensive - bad ass leather vest.

Very biker girl meets lady who lunches.

And this sweet thing reminds me of it:
Oh, you can get it this spring at Club Monaco. I actually found this photo on the website. Is it possible they've hired some web intern??

SPecifics

In light of great reader response to my ramblings on the Stoner Plate, I thought I'd regale you with a few of its building blocks a la Krissie.

Note that this method is not only a boon for modern parents (you can pull together dinner in 10 minutes - no matter the fussiness of the kid - while doing homework simultaneously), but also works wonders for the starving uni student (given how many inexpensive and delicious options one can combine).

For young people beginning to learn about cooking - and about what they like - it's a great lesson in food preparation. It also teaches about combining nutritional building blocks (fats, carbs and protein in customized ratios that work for each individual) and about portion size - something many junk-crazed adolescents and adults really should be considering.

So, without further ado, and in no particular order, why not try a meal composed of 3 - 6 of these:

• 4 mini celery stalks with tbsp almond butter
  
• 8 baby carrots with 2 tbsp. hummus or dip
• Rice crackers (one serving size)
  
• Brie or any cheese in the known universe, 1 oz
  
• Moderate bowl of soup (preferably previously homemade or freshly purchased)
• V8 - vodka optional
• 5 mini meatballs with sauce (aim for organic or "faux" i.e. vegetable based protein version)
  
• 5 chicken nuggets with sauce (aim for organic or "faux" i.e. vegetable based protein version)
• Hard boiled egg
• Olives - 6
  
• Pickle - 1 unless mini cornichons
  
• 2 oz Smoked salmon on one slice flax toast (2 tsp. butter or cream cheese optional)
  
• Apple or pear wedges with chutney
  
• 2 sectioned and peeled oranges with tbsp olive oil, sundried olives and chili flakes - a bit finicky but great when you have a few extra minutes and you need a jolt of beautiful colour.
• Banana with 2 tbsp cream and dash vanilla
• Asparagus spears (you can even microwave these - carefully)
• Nuts and seeds (1 -2 tbsp)
  
• Smoked almonds (12 - 20)
  
• Small serving organic potato chips in saucy flavour - don't overdo portion size.
• 4-5 slices thinly sliced salami rolled up artfully
• Cherry tomatoes
• Tomatoes and feta (1 big tomato, 1 oz feta, 1 tbsp olive oil, salt and pepper)
• Cucumber slices
• 2 squares of EXCELLENT chocolate
• 2 organic or homemade / fancy cookies - forgo the crap, it's not worth it
• Baked apple with some butter, 2 tbsp oats a tbsp flour and a tbsp brown sugar. Add some vanilla.
• Plain yogurt with frozen blueberries and tsp. maple syrup. You can thaw the bbs in microwave. Mmmmm
  
• Protein shake - with hemp protein (raw food), plain yogurt, ice, fruit
  

Seriously, I could go on - and I'm sure you can suggest a dozen great alternatives, so please do.

A Word About the Stoner Plate as Spa Plate:

Now, if you're a growing person, it's important to make your SP choices healthy and never count calories.

However, if you have been an adult for the last 20 years, for example, and you've had a baby or three and you work full time, or have been stressed out of your mind lately and have struggled to fit in exercise, and you're looking to maintain or - as part as a series of other healthful lifestyle measures - even diminish your current weight slightly, I suggest you cap the meal at about 400 calories (in 3 to 6 of the savory options above - some, obviously, are more calorie dense than others). Plus, if it's your thing, add a small glass of wine (aka a unit) and a small dessert option. Then voila, you have your evening eating all planned out.

Naturally, weight loss / maintenance - not something I profess to be an expert on in any way, in light of its complex and individual emotional and physiological factors - depends to some extent on:

• Stable metabolism - it doesn't need to be fast, but it helps when it's functioning well for your own body chemistry
  
• Moderation in consumption and exercise
  
• Adequate sleep
• Managing stress to mitigate thyroid, adrenal and other stress-induced weight affectors. Please see my Health and Lifestyle Theme Week posts for an endless, multi-post discussion of these... and
  
• Healthful eating
  

I suspect that, more than anything, it depends on developing (or having by nature) an attitude of acceptance in the moment. Each meal is its own thing. The next meal is the next thing. Each moment of exercise - or simple movement - is a chance to discover joy in one's physical abilities, each day of slothfulness an opportunity to chill and gain relaxation through inertia.

When one intuits, not merely intellectualizes, that a piece of cake (or an entire pie) is simply food - delicious and lovely to be sure - but not a substitute for anything (except maybe equally yummy cookies :-)), not a path out of darkness, not a friend to confide in - well, then... it starts to occupy its rightful place.

A conflation of (dull and yet personal) occurrences led me from my most destructive time of food abuse. However, a key awareness I developed, is that every meal begins and ends. And a few hours later, there's another one. I don't need to derive everything from this bout of consumption. If I want chocolate, but I've already had a cookie, well can't I wait for the next meal? And, by extrapolation, when I get comfortable with that concept, can't I wait for the next day if it assists me in achieving a goal of weight moderation or maintenance or health?

I'm not sharing this to contribute to a pantheon of "weight discussions" which support controlling one's appetite for ill effect. Look at yourself. If you like what you see, and you're healthy, then stop worrying about it and enjoy that liberty.

If you look at yourself, and you recognize that your habits are undermining your health, happiness and appearance, then be moderate. Be nutritious. Support the you which you want to see emerge by supporting the you you happen to be at this moment. They are one and the same. So stop with the hate. Stop with its by-product, the excuses.

Wow, I feel I should get some kind of Oprah-sanctioned book deal for this. Or a kick upside the head.

Of course, feel free to share your thoughts and feelings.

That's Ms. Espanya to You, Bitches.

You know a heretofore virtual friendship has potential when you unwittingly show up in complementary colours, no?

After what seems like months of health misery and blahs and stress and crap weather, I have had a tremendously exciting and enjoyable weekend. In January. In Toronto. I know, it boggles the mind.

Of course, I'm going to drag it out into 7 posts - so insanely action packed has it all been - but I have to start here, on Saturday morning, hanging at Pantry with the entirely gorgeous (and totally hilarious) Tanya Espanya.

Two hours literally flew by and T actually got in 10 words edgewise, so I know she too considers it a success :-) Lest you doubt we are entirely happening urban grlzzz, conversation veered from vacations to vibrators (Monkey, I threw this one in there for you honey), from fashion to food. It was good times, peeps.

No doubt you will see more of her, and of our adventures, when she returns from her jaunt to San Diego. In the meanwhile, try not to hate her.

Oh, and like this wasn't exciting enough, on my way home I stopped into the insanely expensive artisanal cheese shop close to Ossington, spent $26.00 on two small wedges of super special, raw something or other from Spain (it was the theme of the day, ok?), and managed to run smack into Sarah Polley in the process. The lovely, unpretentious and well-known-to-be-reclusive, uber talent was there with her delightful looking boyfriend, and we managed to have one of those incredibly Toronto conversations, the hallmark of which is polite reservation.

Essentially, I bitched about this guy and his two nightmare children, who literally smashed into our bastien of dairy-peacefulness, traumatizing the Yorkie who lives there and threatening to knock over hundreds of dollars worth of chutney. To her credit, Ms. Polley was serene through it all, and sweetly hummed a children's rhyme, making evident the beauty of her singing voice, which is also well known. Fuckin' stars. They are so not like us.

Strangely, I used to do yoga with Sarah when we were both much younger - she, a teenager, I a young adult in teacher training. I mean, it's not like she remembered me, but it's so true that there are, like, 3 neighbourhoods in this entire city. Dare I suggest that mine's the coolest? Ms. T, she of the east end, is gonna kick my ass for saying that.

WTF?!?!

My daughter just spent the last hour traumatizing showing me "really good old days videos". Top on her list - no joke - were Britney Bitch's Baby One More Time and (OMG) Thriller. OK, do y'all remember how scary that video was? And not simply for the fashions.

I sense I've become one of those moms who wistfully remembers the past as her child discovers it for the first time. Saying things like "I tried to get tickets to that concert but they were all sold out." and "I loved that song but my mother thought it was louche so she made me turn it off when I blared it on the radio."

Parenting scares the shit out of me. Please discuss.

Thing I Love

I usually don't "bloggy love" things of which you can't find decent photos on the web. I mean, how am I supposed to do the advertising without decent tools??

But today I bought a pair of undies (g-string, thong, whatever you wanna call them) that are sooo comfy and sooo sexy on account of their perfect fit, I will write about them nonetheless.

The company, Minerva, is Greek. I'd never heard of it till today. The style is the basic Fimelle lace string. You hard core thong wearers - or those who steadfastly refuse to wear them because they contribute to sausaging around the hips - will appreciate the neither too-thick nor too-thin lace band. It's also neither too low-rise nor high-style (hideous on most, to be sure).

I am positive they will work on many hard-to-thong bodies, regardless of size. And they come in the perfect shade of neutral beige (as well as black). Now, I paid about $25.00 for them, which you may think is high on drugs. But you know my stance on the undies that make your ass look good...

Here's a picture of someone else's:


No guarantee that yours will be quite as fantastic, but no harm giving it a go!

Secret trick: Buy them one size up.