After work I hightailed it to Holt Renfrew - to the Bobbi Brown counter - with visions of gel eyeliner dancing in my head. I seem to be preoccupied with it. I had a practical mandate as well: the latest tube of my fave BB lipstick (Cassis) just came to an end and, as it's the only kind I wear (yes, boring I realize) I needed to replace it stat. Cuz I don't leave the house without lipstick - and flicking out the last bits with my finger and smearing it on is just trashy. Though strangely effective.
At any rate, at the BB counter I learned some shocking truths:
The gel eyeliner, it of massive fame, is a very reasonable $25.00. Alas that doesn't include the brush you need to purchase to apply it - that's another $25.00. And then you have to clean the freakin' brush after every use?! I don't know about you but high maintenance make up just isn't going to fly. As I've said at least a hundred times, I'm a working mother homeowner. I don't have time to clean brushes. (Note that when I expressed this to my husband he suggested that somehow I have no time to clean brushes but I can find 7 hours to make a tart. Whatever.) Why didn't anyone mention this when talking up this product?
Now I had eyeliner on the brain. I'd been thinking about it for weeks. So I was destined to walk out of there with something. My very helpful SA suggested a liquid Lancome product - not a brand I know anything about - that comes in a little tube in smoke colour. Hello? What a terrific idea. It would be great for redheads. I have very green eyes and it looks terrific on me. It's not as severe as black so maybe blonds would appreciate it? Anyway, that was a no-brainer purchase. I'm very satisfied. Esp. since it is much easier to apply than the free L'oreal stuff I got a while back. Not cheap though at $36.00.
But wait, there's more.
I asked for my Cassis and I was told it has been discontinued. What?!?!? It is my only shade. It is a perfect shade - kind of plum meets red with almost silent undertones of brown. I've been wearing it for decades. Seriously. How could they have cancelled it? The SA commiserated. It was her fave flave as well. Apparently, it's everyone's fave. No one can understand what kind of corrupt corporate politics could have resulted in this cold discontinuation.
Of course, it was time - through my haze of trauma - to move on. A girl can only bitch about the loss of lipstick options for so long. So I reviewed the other 8000 BB shades for a suitable replacement.
OK, is it just me or does Bobbi Brown sell 8000 shades of lipstick that are basically all the same colour? Which is brown, by the way.
She should be calling her line Bobbi Tawny Brown and just be done with it.
I couldn't distinguish one taupe from another. Eventually, I went with the plumiest brown there was (trust me it's a stretch) and when I turned over the tube to see what it was called, discovered I had actually bought it a couple of times before - during my occasional "branch out" phases. It's called Raisin. But don't let that fool you, it's brown. And it seems even browner now than it did when I bought it a few years ago. Although, that could be in my imagination.
Without question the Bobbi Brown lipstick is a superior product, colour notwithstanding. I can't give up on the brand yet, though I am considering waging a grass roots campaign called "No More Nude" (nude being the ridiculous industry term to describe pale and not an accurate reflection of the colour of many actual nude people).
Care to join me?